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I will say: 1) I have one best friend whom I never, ever send job postings from my work even when they are looking and the posting is in their field because I know I would never be able to negotiate having this person in work-person form as my colleague. They might think this makes me a bad friend, if they knew. But I know deep in my heart it is to preserve our friendship! Or at least my stake in our friendship. And 2) making experimental theater with my group of grad school friends and our former grad school instructor and trying to create a company together was, like, the very best and the very hardest thing. Exactly for all the reasons you describe.

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YES the work threshold also wigs me out the most...which also sobers me when I realize how much of everything else we do is also so work adjacent, even if it isn't our 9-5!

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